Friday, March 6, 2009

relationships

The heart of one person moves another's.- Daisaku Ikeda

Our interaction with others mirros the inner realm of our own lives. It is here that our lack of wisdom or compassion is starkly revealed. It is here that arrogance and cowardice are glaringly exposed. For these reasons, it's often easier to avoid interaction with others rather than trigger these less desirable sides of our character.
We can quit or job or dump a love interest just so many times before we find ourselves gradually becoming chronically unemployed and terminally lonely. Avoiding the problems of human interaction is to succumb to more negative influences. It is to allow ourselves to wallow in the muck and mire of our own lesser self. And that's not happiness.
There is a great line from the movie As Good As It Gets starring Helen Hunt and Jack Nicholson that says it best.
Nicholson plays a self-absorbed curmudgeon who has unexpectedly fallen for the younger Hunt. They find themselves on a date, of sorts, in a nice restaurant in Baltimore. She finaaly demands in exasperation that he stop talking about hinself and say something complimentary to her or she's going to walk out of his life. This is his one shot at touching her heart. But again he begins talking about his problems, his way of life, his priorities. he gets up to leave when finally he says, "You make me want to be a better man." At first she hears only that it's something else about him. But then realizes the compliment. She has become important enough to him for him to want to change himself for the better in order to keep her.
Relationships that matter enough for us to wish to become better people are a crucible for inner transformation, lasting happiness and the cornerstone of world peace.
-Gaudioso & Martin.